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Mafia

Moderated by: Speed Bike Pro

game 25 day 1 gotta have my bowl gotta have cereal

Posted February 23, 2014 by Speed Bike Pro

The alarm clock blinked to 7:00 AM as a shrill buzzing sound pierced the darkness of the bedroom. Once, twice, thrice until a tired hand slammed down on the snooze button.

"Gee willikers, this isn't why I'm a morning person..."

Black Yoshi pulled the sheets from over his face and sat up with a stiff yawn. The sweet sound of birds chirping outside and dim sunlight leaking in through the cracks in the blinds refreshed his excitement for the new day. Getting out of bed, it was as if he left a roll of quarters in his pocket, if you catch my drift, and hastily retreated into the bathroom with the latest issue of Southern Living.

A delicious aroma permeated the air and the scent of English muffins and turkey bacon thoroughly whetted Black Yoshi's appetite.

"Is that my fave!?", he yelled excitedly from behind closed potty doors.

"Why, it couldn't be anything else!" The response came from the kitchen as The Bandit delicately crafted a breakfast for the ages. As soon as Black Yoshi finished tending to his morning woodcutting, if you understand the implications of what I am saying right now, he entered the room and saw The Bandit wearing nothing but his favorite 'KISS THE COOK' apron and a pair of socks. Black Yoshi pranced over to the vintage record holder sitting in the corner of the room and dropped the needle on his favorite track.




"Any chance I can get some... sausage... with that toast?"

~~~~

Across the town of Ctrblacksburg, Bubba was picking out his favorite tuxedo to wear to his first day of work while an acquaintance of his was packing a lunchbox for their very own work day.

"That again? Even after we had it last night?" Bubba seemed perplexed by his friend's choice of cuisine.

"Angus bologna balls", Hindenburg spat in response. Bubba dismissed it with a shrug of his shoulders and grabbed his suitcase on his way out the door. After filling his pail with nothing but protein powder, Hindenburg adjusted his Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle pajama onesie and followed Bubba out the front door. They went to their separate vehicles, a bicycle with training wheels and a luxurious Mercedes Benz respectively, and departed for their jobs.

~~~

*knock* *knock* *knock*

Apollo Justice's rapping on the door didn't seem to garner any kind of response from within the household. With each second that passed, she grew increasingly worried. Once a full minute had ticked off the click, she took action and threw a hefty rock through one of the front windows on the face of the house.




With a deft leap and agile roll, she landed inside of the house's living room safely. In case of any immediate threats, she quickly dashed to the shadows to avoid being spotted. Seeing as how no one had attacked her yet, she ripped off one of the sleeves to her shirt and tied it around her head and cautiously crept through the house, holding up her hand like it was a gun.

She approached the door to the study, which had been closed to the point that only a small crack was left open, and saw what appeared to be blood on the floor through this opening. With nary a sound, she approached the door and slowly pushed it open. It was then that she saw the body on the floor.

"WHITE LANCER! NO!! IT'S NOT EVEN DAY 1 YET!!!", she exclaimed. She quickly ran to where his motionless body lay and collapsed to her knees in the pool of blood, cradling his head in her lap and hoping that everything was okay. Until...

"Huh? What are you doing here, Apollo?" white lancer's eyes had opened but he was the one with a confused look on his face, as if he wasn't the one who just witnessed a dead person come back to life. Apollo explained the situation to him; the break-in, the sneaking, the blood, everything. A smile spread across white lancer's face as he happily explained.

"Ever since I was a little boy, I've been prone to instantaneous losses of consciousness. The last thing I remember, I was getting this bottle of ketchup from the fridge to eat for breakfast!" He pulled a squashed bottle of ketchup from underneath his body and laughed. After a brief pause to get over her shock, Apollo allowed herself to laugh as well.

After cleaning up the mess that had been made, Apollo Justice went on her way to work still wearing her headband and white lancer retrieved a new bottle of ketchup from his fridge to dine on before he did the same.

~~~

"It's time to wake up! You're gonna be late for work!"

Feral Wolf had jumped down from his top bunk bed and was shaking Lady Flare to rouse her from her deep sleep in her bottom bunk bed. She groaned and rubbed the sleepies from her eyes but clutched her stuffed Flareon to her chest to spite the day she had ahead of her. She sat stubbornly in her bed, unmoving despite Feral's best attempts to coerce her to get ready.

"Ya know, Pirate_Ninja and hezekiah are here! They wanted to see how we were doing after our first night in Ctrblacksburg. They're waiting in the living room!"

Lady Flare's eyes lit up suddenly with excitement. "Pirate_Ninja and hezekiah?", she thought to herself. "Two of my favorite people!" She finally threw off her Thomas the Tank Engine sheets and went with Feral to the living room.

Certainly enough, there sat their two guests; Pirate_Ninja wearing his trademark top hat and cloak and hezekiah meditating in a seemingly vegetative state. Lady Flare welcomed them both but failed to get a response from hezekiah.

"Is he alright? He doesn't really seem to be... breathing", she asked quizzically. Feral approached him and held two fingers to hezekiah's neck to feel for a pulse.

"How do you do this again? Count the beats for 10 seconds and then multiply that by 6? Okay, okay, easy enough... What's 0 multiplied by 6?"

Lady Flare gasped. Pirate_Ninja had no words but instead provided a picture to express his thoughts...



Feral backed away from hezekiah's limp body. "He's.... HE DED." The silence in the room was almost deafening. Suddenly, it was all shattered by two simple words.

"I'm ready", hezekiah muttered.

Lady Flare let out a massive sigh of relief and Feral dropped the cup of sweet potatoes baby food he had started to snack on. Pirate_Ninja's thoughts could not so easily be expressed by actions but rather by a picture...



After the four embraced, Pirate_Ninja and hezekiah left for their jobs while Feral and Lady Flare prepared for the long day ahead of them.

~~~

Jo Nathan slowly opened his eyes as he realized that it was time to get out of bed after a long and fulfilling night of rest. With a quick glance, he checked the clock on the nightstand and reached over to check his phone for any messages he might have gotten overnight. There was nothing new but he found a peculiar text conversation from the night before, one that he didn't remember having. A conversation involving lots of lewd suggestions and eventually a proposal to meet up. In fact, he didn't remember much from the previous night at all. What did happen?

He rolled over as he tried to piece everything together and was startled when he found a person lying next to him.

"Was it good for you too?", Shadowwalked asked as he puffed on his mahogany pipe. Jo Nathan was utterly flabbergasted by the presence of this character.

"Wha-...? Why are you here? What happened?"

"Oh, you don't remember? How precious. You did go pretty hard with that pineapple juice last night. But oh well. You know how to reach me when you're ready for more." With that, Shadowwalked hopped out of bed and picked up his pair of whitey tighties from the bedroom floor and disappeared through the door.

Jo Nathan was still utterly dumbfounded.

"Who was that and why did I ask him for a 'Mongolian Sizzler' in this text?"

~~~

As everyone headed off to their respective jobs, the day was officially underway. Crime is still afoot, however, and the denizens of Ctrblacksburg took it upon themselves to discuss amongst each other who might be the culprits.

(Game note: nothing I say in the narrative will be indicative of roles or actions within the game at all so don't try to read between the lines because there's nothing there besides my homoerotic fantasies)

Players:
white lancer
The Bandit
Jo Nathan
Bubba
Feral Wolf
Apollo Justice
Shadowwalked
Black Yoshi
Lady Flare
Pirate_Ninja
hezekiah
Hindenburg

Ratio:
8-3-1

Roles:
McDonald's Burger Flipper, Panda Express Janitor, Waffle House Waiter, Dairy Queen Store Associate, Wal-Mart Retail Associates x4
Denny's Bus Boy, Taco Bell Window Worjer, Starbucks Barista
Papa John's Delivery Driver

Round will end after 72 hours have passed or 8 votes for the same option are reached.

There are 38 Replies


ticked off the click


TICKED OFF THE CLOCK* I'M SORRY I FAILED TO PROOFREAD THAT PART

February 23, 2014
Speed Bike Pro
 

And also Taco Bell Window Worker*

please forgive me I was in a hurry ;____;

February 23, 2014
Speed Bike Pro
 

I like the idea of the different jobs.

February 23, 2014
Lady Flare

I'm loving this already. AND NOT IN THAT WAY...

February 23, 2014
Black Yoshi

(:|)

February 23, 2014
Hindenburg
Life's path is never straight.



11/10

February 23, 2014
Apollo Justice

Gee, Shadowwalked, what's the hurry? We could have done breakfast or something... (no)

February 24, 2014
Jo Nathan

This is the funniest game of Mafia yet. It's ironic that I am roomates with Flare, since I have known her longer than any other player, 10+ years.

Since we have no proffesors in this town, time for an anatomy lesson for Speed.

The stiffness a man sometimes deals with after a lengthy sleep has nothing to do with arousal. When they say that a man's genitals have a mind of their own, they weren't kidding. It stiffins and softens repeatedly thought the sleeping area as a form a unconsious excersize. A "morningwood" as they call it simply occures when the man wakes on the wrong side of the cycle.

Now that the anatomy lesson is over, let's kill some Mafia.

February 24, 2014
Feral Wolf
The Rogue Wolf

aww, thanks Fictional Day 1 Flavor Text Lady Flare...that's such a nice thing for you to not actually have said (:$)


(Game note: nothing I say in the narrative will be indicative of roles or actions within the game at all so don't try to read between the lines because there's nothing there besides my homoerotic fantasies)



February 24, 2014
Pirate_Ninja

Morning wood? Is that some kind of treestump?

February 24, 2014
Apollo Justice

Is that sarcasm, Apollo, or are you really not familliar with that term? We are all adults here in CTRBlacksville, right?

"Morningwood" refers to an erection a man(or any male mammel) can wake up with. It is not very comfortable, to say the least.

February 24, 2014
Feral Wolf
The Rogue Wolf

I must say, this Day 1 is off to a swell start.

February 24, 2014
Jo Nathan

I only have one question for Feral.

Why do you get the top bunk?

February 24, 2014
Lady Flare

I, too, am gay.

February 24, 2014
Hindenburg
Life's path is never straight.

I must say, this Day 1 is off to a swell start.
it shows we've got a lot of upstanding citizens here in town

February 24, 2014
Pirate_Ninja

I'm refusing to play mafia until minimum wage is raised to $20 an hour.

February 24, 2014
Bubba

Let's wrap this up y'all, I've got shit to do.

February 24, 2014
The Bandit



February 24, 2014
Apollo Justice

no please

February 24, 2014
Apollo Justice



February 24, 2014
Apollo Justice

Gee, Shadowwalked, what's the hurry? We could have done breakfast or something...

Sorry, I've got a lot of work to do in this town.....few are capable of performing a good Mongolian Sizzler. It's a technique that has been passed through my family for generations..

February 24, 2014
Shadowwalked

row row row your scrote

February 24, 2014
Hindenburg
Life's path is never straight.

I, too, am gay.

I think we all are this game.

February 25, 2014
Bubba

Instead of just hoping not to die, can I just give the Mafia a portion of my wages? Buy them off? I'm sure I can offer them enough with my...minimum-wage job. Of course, then I'll probably starve to death.

New plan: Mafia, kill me instantly. Much quicker than death by starvation.

February 25, 2014
white lancer

Also, I just want to throw out there that the Cop should come forward if they get even a single Guilty verdict. They can only catch two of the Mafia members anyway, and they're the two most powerful Mafia members (especially the Assassin, who we want to get rid of ASAP). Innocent verdicts, on the other hand, are much less useful than they were before since 1/3 of the Mafia shows up as Innocent--they're worth very little this game until the Godfather is dead.

February 25, 2014
white lancer

...and by 'come forward' I mean tell someone OOG, since that's allowed this time around. Much safer than simply saying something in the thread.

February 25, 2014
white lancer

KILL

February 25, 2014
Hindenburg
Life's path is never straight.

wait why did I go to white lancer's house

February 25, 2014
Apollo Justice

Because die Mafia

February 25, 2014
Jo Nathan

Host reminder: a little over 22 hours remain in the round.

February 25, 2014
Speed Bike Pro
 

Well that being the case, I certainly can't risk leaving things the way they are right now...

February 25, 2014
Jo Nathan

Alright. Well, I agree with wl's suggestion that the cop come forward with a guilty verdict if one is received, given that right there gets 50% of what he's useful for. I would prefer to make a kill today, but I haven't seen anything jump out at me to suggest a target.

February 26, 2014
hezekiah

That'll be the usual, please.

February 26, 2014
Black Yoshi



February 26, 2014
Lady Flare

That'll be the usual, please.


A pepperoni pizza pie, please!

February 26, 2014
Apollo Justice

Guess we are all busy at our jobs. Since nothing will happen today...

February 26, 2014
Feral Wolf
The Rogue Wolf

One more vote would have ended it.

We let the round drag on so we could have nothing but silence.

{fp}

February 26, 2014
Jo Nathan

Day 1 is over.

February 26, 2014
Speed Bike Pro
 

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